Understanding the language and terminology of the LGBTQ+ community

Remain open-minded

Terminology and language is personal to the individual, which means there may be a chance we’ll get it wrong, perhaps even wrongly assume and make a genuine mistake based on previous knowledge or conversations with others. It is important to remain open-minded and listen to the individual who may politely challenge you because they do not like or associate with that terminology. Apologise, and do your best to not make the same mistake again (for that individual) in future.

Take opportunities to ‘invite people in’ rather than calling them out

This is for those who may want to challenge the use of incorrect terminology. Respect that most individuals are trying their best to learn. It can be very disengaging when an individual corrects and criticises somebody for using the wrong terminology, especially when the term may be used by some within the community and not by others.

I know some terminology can be emotive and triggering to some (especially a marginalised community), but we must recognise that this may not be the case for others. I have even been subject to this, being a part of the LGBTQ+ community myself, and this does not create a psychologically safe space to learn and educate. I can only imagine how challenging this may be for those outside of the community who are trying their best to learn and be allies. Of course, we need to be explicit in what we deem unacceptable, but we also need to recognise that this is personal to us. Our opinion may not necessarily be the voice of the whole community.

For me personally, I like to hear how and why the other person thought it was acceptable to say what they said, and I then ask open questions. Where have they heard this term before? Has somebody else used this term? Who else have they had conversations with about this? Then I offer my perspective and how it makes me feel, as this tends to create that open dialogue where I can respectfully make challenges. This discussion allows more questions and can even reshape their thinking, while recognising and respecting that this is my perspective only.

Allowing an open dialogue and creating a safe space enables us to share all of our unique and individual personal experiences and learn from them. This not only helps us move forward as a community but also keeps our allies engaged and moving forward with us, too.

Next steps to understanding LGBTQ+ terminology with Inclusive Employers

To provide more support on this topic for you and your colleagues, we have created a glossary of LGBTQ+ terminology – we hope you will find it useful. We also offer more advice and tips on our podcast, how to support LGTBQ+ colleagues, where you can also get an insight into experiences of LGBTQ+ stereotypes in the workplace, LGBTQ+ staff networks and the use of pronouns.

If you’d like to know more about how to build inclusive workplaces from our expert team, please fill out the form below. If you’re a member please get in touch with your account manager.